Collateral damage

While doing my job as a all-in-one IT guy, there are so many times that I had came across issues which I could have make my own life easier by letting them go but didn't. It involves rubbing salt into old and fresh wounds, opening cans of worms and Pandora boxes, stepping on toes, jumping over people's heads, crossing hostile territories and getting death threats.

Ok I admit that I am making up the last one. Anyway, the benefits are there for the organisation to reap while I siphon some cash in return, making it a fair trade. But playing the devil with good intentions does require human sacrifices. I prefer to call them collateral damage, which could range from the lightest form as extra work for people, making people look bad to making people disappear.

Lately I claimed my latest victim, who was caught red handed in the cookie jar, and will end up exiting the organisation in shame. What did I gained? Nothing much except some extra work and the satisfaction of tasting blood. How about the organisation? Well this latest exploit bought them a few more weeks of time to drag their feet to get things done through the slow moving bureaucracy.

I am sure during the course my career in the organisation, more people will be crucified and sacrificed in the pursue of the betterment of the organisation .. and myself.

Next time, be wary of the IT guy next to you. You have been warned.

How fast can a reward turned sour?

Somewhere around 15 minutes.

During last month department meeting, I got a surprise when my group head Mr See announced that I had won a newly created reward. This reward was meant for recognizing one person per department who had slaved the most to contribute to the department. I guess either my hard work and commitment to work had got me something to show for it. But instead, it is my lack of social life had came back to haunt me.

I opened up the envelop and read the content of the letter inside. The reward was a stay in one of the YTL luxury resorts in the region ... for 2. That's about when all the euphoria sunk to the deepest hole in the oceans.

Ok, let's review the conditions.

1. To be used within a year.
   Sounds fair.
2. For a stay for about 2 days/1 night.
   Hmm no transport? Some of the resorts are really far out. No problem though.
   
3. Employee must be present with employee pass.
   Cannot sell or give away to anyone. I must be present to check in. Ahh no trading or Ebay. Oh wait, must be employee pass! That means I cannot quit to claim it.
   
4. For 2 person
   Ok this is the worst part. I can't give it to my parents because of condition 3. If I bring my sisters, I need to pay for an additional headcount. Not all resorts have the capacity to allow a 3rd person in the room provided.
   

And with the above conditions, the reward quickly turned sour. I had a few options.

1. Let it lapse.
   Hope everyone forget it.
   
2. Forcibly give it away.
   Tell my department head that I don't want the reward.
3. Go alone.
   I rather stay at home then.
4. Go with sisters.
   I got to cough up extra $$$ to rope in my youngest sister because she will go bankrupt after the upcoming Tokyo trip in November.
5. Go with a buddy.
   Gayyyyy.
   
6. Get a girlfriend and go.
   ... and risk being labeled as a wolf.
7. Go with the other winners.
   Most of them are attached, married, wrong age group or are guys.
   

Not long after, HR decided to send out a email broadcast to everyone to announce the winners of the rewards. So, whenever someone came around to say congratulate me, the (heart) pain revisited me. Ouchie.

Anyway, got to make a choice, and I made it Tembok Bali, the spa resort.

Bodyguards and Assassins : After thoughts

Warning : Spoilers alert + crappy commentaries

In the movie, Sun Yat-Sen went to Hong Kong to hold a meeting to convince a group of Qing Dynasty haters to organise an uprising throughout China simultaneously. Empress Dowager Cix sent a team of assassins to murder Sun Yat-Sen while a local Hong Kong business man Li Yu Tang formed a cracked team of mainly rickshaw pullers and printing press employees to play defense.

The action started after 1.5 hours of character building. Somehow, Li Yu-Tang managed to pull off several miracles, and eventually bought enough time through a decoy mission for Sun Yat-Sen's meeting to be completed.

Here are some highlights.

• A Shaolin monk, Wang Fu Ming who was like the Orient version of the Hulk, smashed through groups of assassins while taking so much damage that I thought he should have died in two scenes before he actually died.
  
  
• Performed hardening roof and sides of the rickshaws used in the convey but neglected to add an extra armor plate to protect the back of the passenger.
  
  
• Get a incestuous opium powered begger Mr Liu played by Leon Lai to hold off an entire team of assassins ... alone using a metal fan with fatal results to everyone including himself.
  

After watching scenes after scenes of heroics, I realised that all these could had only happened because of the lack of communication technology in the past. The events depicted in the movie occurred almost a hundred years ago, when the only form of long range electronic communication technology available was the telegraph. So how could this be done better (in Singapore's context) today?

1. Use a conference call instead of a meeting. Skype? MSN?
2. Employ Cisco Certis guards instead of rickshaw pullers.
3. Cordoned off the paths used by the convoy instead of leaving it to fate.

It's not bad for a Chinese movie, so catch it on DVDs soon if you have not done so.